25 May 2026

“And now that you don’t have to be perfect, you can be good.”

John Steinbeck wrote those words in East of Eden 74 years ago, and many of us are still working on this lesson.

Perfection can be paralyzing. Biggest example for me: procrastinating weekly about my blog, trying to find something valuable to say and also the perfect way to say it (spoiler alert: it doesn’t exist - so please, feedback, both positive and critical, is welcome).

Did you ever go to a restaurant and spend long minutes poring over the menu to find the best choice? Saturday, my husband and I went out to our local Italian. My favorite special was on the menu, zucchetti with roasted vegetables. It’s a delicious blend of flavors, but its one flaw is the lack of protein (groan, I know…I, too, am sick of hearing about protein, protein, protein, but when going plant based and dining out, you need to think about these things). Of course, protein options are offered on the menu - all animal foods - so I just decided to have it as is (and really enjoyed it).

But perfection can have much bigger ramifications than menu selection. Striving for perfection can stop us from taking action in our lives toward becoming a better person. “Rather than thinking about my food choices now, I’ll start my diet next week, when I have all the right groceries, no special events to attend and can follow a plan to the T.

PSA: diets don’t work. Long-term solutions require lifestyle changes, not short-term restriction. And life is messy. Things don’t always go perfectly - we shouldn’t expect our responses to be. But we can build up our skills, priorities and resilience.

I think the biggest problem with perfectionism is its lack of compassion. Self criticism often eclipses really good effort. If I had a dollar for every client that started a session by describing all their diet missteps, I’d be making a lot more money (LOL). Nit-picking our own behavior can lead to dissatisfaction with ourself. And who wants to take good care of a body that we don’t love?

At the opposite end, we have the person who thinks everything they do is perfect. The flaw here is that person lacks the humility to admit faults and the curiosity to learn. Flawlessness may also increase fear. Perfectionism may limit someone’s actions due to dread of being less than perfect at this new thing. Comfort is nice, but the magic happens outside of our comfort zone, even if the lessons and successes don’t pan out exactly the way we imagined.

When I make a mistake or make less than healthy choices, I always think of all the compassionate advice I’ve received from my friend and colleague, Mariana Serback, and one video in particular always makes me laugh - how ridiculous is all-or-none thinking?

If you are on a mission to improve your health, so much is within your power, and progress over perfection is the name of the game. So here’s your today-is-the-first-day-of-the-rest-of-my-life “to do” list:

1. Give yourself compassion. Strive toward the standards you wish to see in yourself, but missing the mark is not a failure, just a learning opportunity.
2. Set realistic goals that prioritize progress. With food choice and other lifestyle behaviors, consistency is more important than magnitude. Celebrate the small wins and incremental success.
3. Embrace vulnerability. We can’t be good at everything. That’s what makes us human, and uniquely valuable. And it’s how we connect.
4. Focus on the impact of your actions - toward yourself and others. Every day, minute, second, is a chance to do better.

IMHO, being a good person is way better than being a perfect one. But I did think of a solution to my zucchetti dilemma. Next time, I’ll just ask for beans in it!